It's the death of what we all consider as "family". It's out of the normal order of things to have a child leave home before it's time before he becomes an adult able to live on his own. We all have the dream that we will be able to instill in our children the independence, sense of values and character to be able to live as good people in a community no matter where they go. Unfortunately, because of the screw ups in their brains as a result of interference of the prenatal use of alcohol and drugs, that just isn't going to happen. Therefore, even though we feel that we should be able to salvage something out of this, there is the grim realization that we can't.